Why is it so Hard to be Positive?

“Doo do do doo de doo, Don’t Worry, Be Happy” are the Bobby Mc Ferrin lyrics I now have stuck in your brain for the day. That isn’t a bad thing. I had to do something to remove the negative heading from your head.

Recently I had a few of my clients discuss negativity with me. These are pretty happy, normal individuals who usually have really positive outlooks on life. Both are model leaders. Yet they suffer from what you and I go through from time to time as well – negative thoughts and self-talk. Left in that state, we can start to wallow in it and allow negativity to take over our thoughts for hours and days.

I could go there right now. I have to be on a special diet for 24 hours, so it is easy to give into the “woe is me” state and bemoan the fact that I am so hungry. Yet, if I was a child, I would be gleeful about the fact that I can eat as much Jell-O, as often as I like, all day.

It has to do with perspective and allowing ourselves to dwell in the negative state or to do something actively to find the positive. It’s about moving our thinking from “oh dear!” to “oh good!” Not always the simplest transition for us as adults.

Here are some thoughts that may be helpful:

  • Start every day with positive affirmations about what you will bring into the world and who you will serve
  • End your day with rating if you did your best to do those two things
  • Don’t dwell on the failures and short comings of the day, ask what lessons you learned from them
  • Find the good things - even the smallest good thing will help you feel better if you acknowledge it
  • Turn the negatives around, whether they are thoughts or things, change the perspective into “as much Jell-O all day, at any time!”  or just hum the tune
  • Gravitate to kind and friendly people who don’t add to your already negative judgment of yourself
  • Learn from them how they keep their attitude positive

Use visual reminders of the positive thoughts and behaviors in places where you will see them daily and often throughout the day.

Don’t worry, be happy.